The last time we spoke

It was agreed. My dad consented to be on the KVEC Morning News show the Friday before Father’s Day, June 17, 2001. 

I thought he would make a great guest. He certainly was qualified. He was, after all, a personification of the Greatest Generation. Born in San Francisco in 1913, Dad endured the traditional patriarchal family upbringing, graduated from Stanford, survived relentless Japanese kamikaze attacks while he commanded an LST in World War II, and became a pivotal force in the world of advertising during the post-war idealism of the 1950s.

Along the way, he had three children, and, following a divorce, adopted a fourth.

In honor of my dad, I am presenting to you the last conversation we ever had, broadcast live. King Harris, Sr. (KSR) on the East Coast, talking to King Harris, Jr. (KJR) on the West Coast.

Our radio conversation that morning went like this.

KJR: So what do you think about fatherhood?

KSR: Well, sometimes I think there are a lot of attributes to it, and sometimes when your children become teenagers, I have my doubts.

KJR: Your first child, Ann, was born two weeks after Pearl Harbor?  

KSR: Ann was conceived before I left for the great Pacific. She was eight months old when I was shipped off, and when I came home, she was three years old, cute as a bug.

KJR: Then you and mom had twins, but they miscarried?

KSR: Yes. But we tried again and got you, one of the joys of my life.

KJR: Are you sure?

KSR: I think overall our friendship has been very amicable and lovable. Except for the time you ran away, and the time you changed your name back. We named you King Harris after me, but you didn’t like using King Harris Jr. growing up, so you used a nickname.

KJR: Who would name a kid King? You were named King after your mother’s maiden name. But Mom’s mother liked the name Nicholas, so all of you compromised and settled for Gnik, with the silent ‘G,’ but we spelled it Nick and I grew up as Nicky.   

KSR: Well, you used those two names until you went on television because you thought King Harris carried more weight, and so you started using my name…without the ‘junior.’

KJR: Ain’t easy being King, is it?

KSR: (Laughter) And don’t forget the third child, James.

KJR: He came right after me.

KSR: 22 months.

KJR: Didn’t waste any time, did you?

KSR: No, I didn’t. And I’ve loved you all ever since.

KJR: Then you and Mom parted ways, you remarried, and Judy was brought into the family.

KSR: Judy was adopted. She was my wife Elizabeth’s child when we got married. She’s the smartest of all of you.

KJR: So it hasn’t all been a bowl of cherries now, has it?

KSR: We’ve all had our problems, but it’s always been the kid’s fault, never the parents.

KJR: Never the parents?

KSR: Never the father.

KJR: Why is that?

KSR: He’s supposed to be the head of the house, but sometimes the kids took over, particularly when we’d go to a restaurant, and you would ask for the head waiter and go right over my head and order whatever you wanted.

KJR: So keeping us in line was a challenge?

KSR: I was not a disciplinarian. I was a loving father and spoiled the heck out of all of you.

KJR: Any major problems you remember?  

KSR: Yes, but all I remember now are happy hours and happy times and great fun.

KJR: Has it been worth it?

KSR: It certainly has. It’s been worth it to me tremendously. I’m very fond and love each and every one of you.

KJR: How do you think we all turned out?

KSR: Great… great…but that was because of my personality. None of you has my sense of humor, and none of you has my real personality, but I love you anyway.

KJR: Are you ready for another Father’s Day?   

KSR: Frankly, no, because every day should be Father’s Day. 

KJR: Are you expecting all your children to call you this Sunday?

KSR: Jimmy will phone and ask if he’s the first one to call. Judy writes notes. Ann is a maybe.

KJR: But I always call.

KSR: You always call in advance. To have me on the radio. Or because you want something.

KJR: How ’bout that car you promised me when I graduated from high school?

KSR: Well, let’s see … I’m 88 now. Maybe next year.

KJR: You’re 88, you’ve had four kids in your life, you look around, and you say it’s been rewarding and fulfilling?

KSR: Absolutely. 90 percent of the time…it’s just been sensational.

KJR: So you wouldn’t trade it?

KSR: I wouldn’t trade any of you in for anything.

KJR: Thanks, Dad. Happy Father’s Day.

It would be the last time we spoke – about the trials of fatherhood, anyway. One month later, on the 20th of July, my dad passed away.

I’m glad I made the call. I’m glad he answered. But then, he always did.